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Weirding people out since 2006.

Thursday, June 15, 2006


I have decided to take an extended break from blogging about my eventual takeover of the world. Frankly, because I don't want to do it (take over the world that is, blogging is still fun) because I realized something. Ruling the world requires a level of micromanagement that is just not for me.

So, instead I'm going to talk about shoes. Yeah, you read that right, shoes.

My mother is what could be called a fashionista. I don't take after her in that regard. She'll suffer for her clothing, I'm just happy if it fits. Absolutely thrilled if the colors coordinate as well.

This, however, does not apply to my fascination for shoes. Not spiky high-heeled stilettos mind you, I still won't suffer for my clothing. But I love boots. Granny boots, hikers, thigh-high, ankle-high, show me a pair of boots with a low heel and I'm drooling. I love the things, even snow boots.

And yet, I only own two pair of boots. Is it because I can't afford the darlings? No. Is it because I'm the type of Mom who will sacrifice everything for her children. Mostly true, but we aren't so poor that this is really an issue. So, why oh why do I have to suffer with only two pairs of boots when I would do just about anything this side of selling my kids for a closet full?

Because I can't find any that FIT! I was born with the curse of a real woman's foot, not that dainty tiny ass foot that they (the shoe retailers) decided to stock on their shelves, but a cotton pickin' triple danged E foot! Not just wide, but extra-freakin' WIDE! And there ain't a shoehorn in the world that can turn a B shoe into a EEE.

So, shoe retailers, I ask you this. If the economy is run on supply and demand, and you want to make as much profit as possible from the masses (and in this case, I'll admit I'm one of 'em, but not with a pitchfork, a spork). I'm demanding, now where the hell is my SUPPLY!?!


Cindy L. said...

Why no supply if there's a demand? For the same reason you have to hunt and search and dig to find comfortable, good-looking clothes (triply difficult if you want to look professional) if you're a never-was-and-never-will-be-a-size-6 woman. Women have been taught through the centuries that tiny feet are it. Personally, if I can't find 'wide' in shoes, I don't buy 'em. That would, of course, explain why I own exactly two pair of shoes, one my nursing pair (those have to be wide, we're talking expansion room). My feet don't measure as wide, I just hate wearing shoes in general and want as much room as possible. Back to the question: Until everyone on Madison Ave is tortured and buried (not necessarily dead), "demand" is going to be governed by what they want to supply.

Casie S. said...

I feel your pain, I've come to hate shoes just because they never fit right. I have big feet, nobody likes to stock a 10.

MightySpork said...

You should try Nordstroms. They carry extra-wide sizes, and will special order anything you want. I am a shoe-whore myself

Brigitta M. said...

Thanks, I'll remember that the next time I go shoe shopping. :)