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Weirding people out since 2006.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Charles Lee Ray

For as small as he was, Chucky was evil as an all get out.

I like that in a guy.

Granted he was the imitation-vodoun-posessed by a serial killer variation of the standard "talking doll" mythology...but still. The problem with the films though is that the only "person" that Chucky could find that was as smart as him was another doll. I mean really, if he scared 'em that much why didn't the folks at least insist on a refund?

Bunch of nitwits if you ask me. I would have made a deal with Chucky, something along the lines of "Consider me your transportation. I'm just gonna take you to a place so you can kill a LOT of people. Here? There's only 4 folks and after us, what'll you have? Days, heck, even weeks before you can get anyplace else." Once he was appeased and his little doll eyes sparkled, I'd give him a list of personal enemies.

Hell, as long as I had a homicidal doll, I'd take advantage of the situation.

Once my enemies were dead? I'd zap his ass in the microwave. Can't have a talking doll that knows all my secrets hanging around now can I?


Cindy said...

I dunno, I'm thinking a microwave isn't gonna do THAT particular little devil in. Think how many times he's been torched and melted, and he keeps on killin'...

Brigitta M. said...

Have you forgotten that all of my items are magically charmed in one way or another? Y'know, like my cellphone that's a portal an' all that? The weather machine that my "Dad" won't let me play with even though the buttons are so shiny? Not to mention the "Wonky Spork."

This particular zapper has soul capturing capabilities as do all my cooking appliances. Keeps my, uh, food, from taking revenge. Be handy in this case as well since Chucky's soul would be melted into the remains of the plastic.

Awfully handy having devices like this. Don'tcha think? ;)

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